Difficult 2 year old

Wondering if anyone can relate. My son will be 2 this week and since he was about 17 months his behaviors just seems extreme. Sometimes he has good days where he has no tantrums and is funny and enjoyable but the majority of the time everything sets him off. The lights in the. Car, his dad sitting next to him, the wrong pants, really could be anything and sometimes it’s all day long. Everything is no (which I know is normal) and I’ve been reading books of how to talk to him effectively, how to validate his feelings (some of which works sometimes) but I’m just at my wits end. Everyday is draining and exhausting and I just feel like is this normal?????? Today after daycare everything made him freak out from taking off this coat to the dog looking at him.