Mental Health Issues

Is anyone struggling with mental health issues? How do you cope? I feel like absolute shit. I try to appear happy to the world, but I am crumbling inside. I broke down today (I was alone). I just couldn’t stop crying. I feel like I’m batshit crazy. My immediate family/friends don’t really know that I struggle with this. I feel hopeless and fatigued all the time. I went to a therapist for a few months. But, she didn’t help me get to a better place. She only told me what I already knew. I try to stay positive, but my mind says otherwise. I don’t discuss it with anyone because they don’t understand or aren’t empathetic/sympathetic in that regard. I’m so embarrassed. I feel so lonely. My life is literally in shambles. I have no one to be free with and destress. I tried talking to my bf about this before, but he thinks it is a joke. I literally just thought about dying today. It just hurts how much people don’t care. I can’t continue to fake it for the rest of my life. It is getting really difficult. I believe people are starting to catch on that things are off with me. I just want to feel “normal” like someone who doesn’t struggle with depression and anxiety. I hate how much things bother me. I wish I could just have an idgaf attitude about things, but I don’t. I’m sensitive. I would consider myself similar to an empath. Any tips to cope?

Note: My doctor gave me medication for anxiety. I took it a few times, but I don’t like how it makes me feel. Also, I prefer not to take any meds. I’m looking for a holistic approach to cope daily. I would like to manage it naturally. I just don’t want to rely on meds to have a “normal” life.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated. I am posting anonymously, but I appreciate and thank anyone with advice.