Frustrated with hubby's work

Jessica • 👨‍👩‍👦👼👼🌈

I need to vent. For my husband's job we need to move every few years (but could also, move at any time with no notice). It stinks for me if I wanted to hold down a job, but I'm also incredibly thankful it affords us a comfortable life. We're not rich, but we don't hurt. I currently stay home with our toddler son. We are expecting our second child in April and are due for a move soon since the project here ended. I was very clear with my husband when we got pregnant that there was a 4 month period where I would refuse to move (February through June). I would also be very uncomfortable with him traveling past February.

Well there's a potential project that my husband has to help prepare a bid for. The company originally gave dates for end of Feb and husband kept telling me it'd be remote (even though I doubted it). Now it is not remote and he will actually be gone the first two weeks of March. I will be 34/35 weeks pregnant. Because of our frequent moves the closest person I trust to watch our son is 3 hours away if I went into early labor. My husband will be working on the bid in Colorado and we are in NH. UGH. I wish he would just communicate with his company that he needs to be remote (bid for project to potentialt client is virtual/remote, but company wants employees who are pitching the project all at their home office). Honestly, it would mean so much to me if he would even ask even if they said no.

I'll admit I'm a little sensitive, because when we were trying to plan our wedding and a move to a different state, his company sent him "short term" to another project on the opposite coast. They called on a Saturday and he left Tuesday for what was supposed to be 2 months... and then he was gone 6.

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COMMENT (4)

Ju

Posted at
I understand what you feel, maybe talk to him and ask if it’s possible to ask them to halve the time he will be there so that he will be with you before 35w, I think it would be a good reason since you are pregnant. My husband’s workplace agreed to let him work from home more since I am afraid of covid and I am also 37w so I want to have him around more just in case I go into labor..

Ju

Ju • Feb 4, 2022
In a blink of an eye*

Ju

Ju • Feb 4, 2022
Oh, dear, I’m so sorry, you are married to an workaholic, my husband was like this, I also had a year like this and we almost divorced..he’ll come around one day when you put your foot down or when he realzies the impact pf his choices has on you as a family and on your children. Try to advocate for yourself more and never accept being on the second place ever again. Money comes and goes, one day you may have everything at your feet, one day life can take it all away inna blink of an ete, what truly matters is family.

Je

Jessica • Feb 4, 2022
I had spoke with him about it, he said he's not going to bother asking since he'll only be there 10 or 11 days instead of 14... but still doesn't negate him being that far away from me :/ I'm pretty hurt because he often does stuff like this with his job. His current project manager straight up asked him how I put up with him being gone for 6 months before our wedding and then moving at 7 months pregnant. He came home and tried to laugh off that even his manager and co-workers think him not asking for occasional leniency for our family at certain times is ridiculous.