My sister and I are pretty close. We both had babies in the same year and that really brought us closer than we have ever been. She is 24 years old and just told me she’s pregnant with her 3rd baby. She has a 5 year old and a 3 year old. I am 28 and I have my Oct 19’ baby and an Angel baby we lost when I was 12.5 weeks this past October. When I told her I was pregnant with our Angel baby she make an appointment the very next week to have her birth control taken out. She told me they weren’t trying for another baby, but she wasn’t getting on birth control again because she doesn’t like how it makes her feel and claims to be allergic to condoms. My miscarriage took place over the course of 3 days- started with some bleeding and 2 trips to the ER. I was considered high risk for miscarriage and was sent home where I eventually passed my baby. After I was sent home from the ER the second time, but before officially losing my baby my sister said “well, maybe next time we can get pregnant together!” Which has stuck with me for some reason. Like she was rooting for me to lose my baby all along. My husband and I have been trying for our rainbow baby for 3 months now, however to avoid the “are you pregnant yet” conversations, we haven’t told anyone we were trying again. But now here she is “accidentally” pregnant for the 3rd time ( neither of her kids were planned). I am just finding it EXTREMELY difficult to be happy for her even though this means another little niece or nephew to love on. She told me she was pregnant via Snapchat and I’m so glad it wasn’t in person because I bawled. I haven’t asked her much about her pregnancy or upcoming appointment because I can’t even pretend to be happy. But I feel HORRIBLE about the way I feel. I’m 2 months away from what would have been my due date and now when that day comes I will just have empty arms and have to watch her glow and show off her ultrasounds and pregnant belly.

Am I a complete asshole for the way I feel? 😕 How do I get over myself and not let her pregnancy get to me like this??