Is my husband cheating ?

Question

Hello everyone, I need some help here. Okay we are both mature and been married for 6 years we have a two year old and the second one on the way. 
I’m having a really hard time understanding if my husband is cheating on me or not. I work full time and he stays home with our son which he wanted to do, when I come back from work I take over and do the night routine with our son and on weekends I let him be free and I take care of our son. I understand he is working really hard but I’m also feeling like I’m working hard and I have no break. Plus I’m pregnant too.  Now the reasons why I’m saying this is today we fought in front of our son. It got pretty bad I asked him to leave the house. He didn’t say goodnight to our son he came home late and we didn’t sleep in the same room. 
When my husband is home and I’m home he is constantly on his phone watching Tiktok videos for hours, on the weekend I ask him to spend time with us and he gets so frustrated over that. I have checked his phone I can’t seem to find anything. I’m starting to conclude that he is cheating on me, but he is smart on how he does it. And our son goes to daycare twice a week so on those days I wonder if he has someone else. I just can’t put it all together please help me. I feel so bad for our son as we just fought in front of him and he was yelling at my husband when he was just straight yelling at me. I feel like a terrible wife and a mother

Answer

Im a SAHM and somewhat addicted to my phone(too much sometimes) mainly out of feeling lonely/isolated, and Im not cheating. Is he unreachable while your son is in daycare? Why are you jumping to cheating? Im not saying he isnt, but it seems like a stretch.
I do however think your arrangement is off. Im a SAHM and Im never 100% relieved of my responsibilities when my husband is home. When hes home, we both still do housework and childcare. Especially if he gets 2 days off while your son is in daycare, unless hes like cleaning the whole house and stuff during that time, I think you need more balance.

Answer

Im not super sure this sounds like cheating but I think you guys have a dangerous arrangement that is more roommates taking turns raising a child rather than one whole family unit. My husband and I also almost fell into that trap and we were always taking turns and never doing anything as a family or quality time with each other alone and we began feeling like roommates that were also parents and not partners. We talked a lot and worked on developing new habits that brought us back together. We share everything 50/50 and weekends are for family time. I would sit down with him and have a really deep talk or possibly therapy. I also think he has a pretty sweet deal getting 2 days completely off and alone, if I were a SAHM I wouldn’t expect that and couldn’t justify the cost. I hope he’s not cheating but definitely have a talk! Also my husband and I are really bad with our phones and on them way too much but neither of us are cheating and we just try to give friendly reminders not to be too consumed with phones during family or quality time.

Answer

I think he’s maybe pulling away and isolating himself a bit, maybe due to stress and the difficulties of being a stay at home parent which is valid. Let him know you’re there for him but give him his space when needed. Don’t pry too much. Maybe check on him to make sure he still wants to be a stay at home dad? Maybe he doesn’t but he would feel guilty saying so. Maybe you can find a sitter and he can get a job, even part time. He might just be tired and burnt out honestly. I know a lot of parents who love their kids, but say they could never be a stay at home parent. If you didn’t find anything on his phone, I don’t think it has anything to do w cheating.

Answer

So I think your husband is struggling with anxiety/depression that has nothing to do with you. He’s probably lonely, struggles with his self worth and lack of friendships as a SAHD. I would maybe suggest counseling. It has helped us immensely and your story sounds a lot like ours.

Answer

I don't think that necessarily means cheating. I've been a SAHM and I spent a ton of time on my phone, and I found myself myself craving more time alone than with family because I was touched out and overstimulated. Now that I'm working I want more family time. It's hard being a stay at home parent, it feels like you never really get a break because even when the other parent is there to help you're still home with the kids, so you never really leave work.

Answer

Um ur not terrible at all ur feelings are valid. When his neglecting u and having his attention on the phone then then it’s normal that u would feel that way, I would too. I can’t really say if his cheating or not because U know best as his ur husband but if his behaviour changed all of a sudden like that then there could be a possibility. I think u should stay calm and approach him calmly maybe u could get something out of him without causing an argument

Answer

I think its time to discuss swapping rolls. He needs to be out working, you need to be home with the baby and your pregnancy. Thats what I would do. In my experience, men thrive when bringing home the bacon 🤷🏼‍♀️

Is my husband cheating ?

Let's Glow!

The Top Baby Tracker App: Embrace New Beginnings with Tender Care

The Top Fertility Tracker App: Your Path to Achieving Pregnancy

The Top Pregnancy App: Nurturing Your Journey to Motherhood

The Top Period Tracker for Empowering Your Menstrual Health Journey