Idk what to title this

I was sexually assaulted twice in one week about a year ago

The first time was in a hotel room. I suffer from bipolar disorder and at one point it led to me being homeless, 2000 miles away from home with no friends or family around. I met a guy named Angel who was also homeless, and 30 minutes after meeting him he raped me in a hotel room. I was completely alone, so I just told myself to get over it and I ended up staying with him.

We slept at a park, where eventually he abandoned me. Same night, his friend sexually assaulted me while I was unconscious. The only reason I know it happened is because the next day when I was awake, he started bragging about it in front of me and a couple other people

I just don’t know what the fuck to do, I came back to my hometown after that and immediately got into a relationship with my ex boyfriend and we’ve been together ever since. I never had time to process what happened and I’m scared because I just feel numb. Like I’m just holding all of it inside, waiting for it to come out. I’ve never been good at expressing how I feel