I need to vent… part 1

I just had a baby about 10 months ago my period was late so I took a test and it came out positive immediately.

I am in no position to have another baby my only options are abortion or give it up to adoption to my parents.

My parents have wanted a child for about 15 years but unfortunately had no luck with conceiving. I live with my parents, I am scared that if I decide to go on with this pregnancy and give the baby up to them that I will be depressed. I feel like I would isolate myself from my family because deep down inside I would want to keep it more than anything. My mom knows im pregnant and we are not seeing eye to eye on the abortion because she feels like it’s not fair that they can’t have a baby after trying and wanting one for so long and it’s just so easy for me to get pregnant and then I want to abort it. My thing is this is not a piece of furniture this is a baby that I will have to carry and feel kick me then when the time comes I would have to sign over my rights. Not only that but I would have to live in the same house as them and I feel like that is what would kill me the most. Waking up everyday seeing the baby knowing i have to act as if it’s my sibling.

I don’t really want to have an abortion but I feel like it’s the best option.

Am i being selfish? I know if I did have the baby and gave jt up for adoption my parents would raise it with love and give it so many opportunities that I could never give them.

Part 2

Edit : I had my doctors appointment and it went unexpectedly I was told that this was a miracle baby because almost 2 months ago I went to the er for horrible period pains along with throwing up they did a ultrasound on me, they seen that my tube swollen and blood found it in and a sphinx. They found my white blood cell count high. This appointment was actually a update appointment until I told her I took a pregnancy test and it came back positive. The doctor said if i have an abortion this will be my last time could ever have kids because every pregnancy would be a tubal… this makes it so much harder i haven’t stopped crying since finding out