So I've been single for 8ish months, and this past week I met my roommate's brother. Its complicated calling him my roommate, because he lives with my family and I but pays rent and has lived up on the same floor of the house as me for a year, but I guess that's what he is. Anyway, I met his brother, and immediately I was attracted to him and felt a connection. The three of us talked for hours and he eventually left, and then later messaged me on Facebook about how nice it was to meet me and talk with us. Then he added me on snap, and we started talking for a few days. My dad is assembling a shed, so he offered to help. I was really getting a vibe and he even asked me to go somewhere w him and I wanted to, but was hesitant because its my roommate's brother. So I had a talk with my roommate, he basically says it's not his business even though it's a little weird. He wasn't gonna get in the middle of other people's shit, which is what I expected. But my roommate did try to make it clear to me that his brother was just casually sleeping with some people, and both his brother and I expressed that first night we all talked that both of us weren't looking for a relationship. He's divorced, his ex is moving out soon, and he's about to start sharing custody of his two kids. It's not a good time for him. My mother is dying from stage 4 cancer, I have a puppy to care for as well as a disabled sister and a house to maintain and a job. Its not a great time for me, either. I thought we'd just sleep together or something, since I'm ready for that.

Cut to today, he spends all day in the heat working on this shed with my father. He stays after and we talk for hours. He funny and kind and super easy to talk to. He's also suuuper perceptive and will ask me what I'm feeling because I'm doing certain things, which totally knocks me off my feet because sometimes it's not easy to say, "I'm fidgeting because I think you're really attractive and I'm uncomfortable with my body." Anyway, the conversation was great and I invited him up to my room. He stands around talking to me for a while, inspects my room and stuff, and eventually he does kiss me.

Now, I thought we might go further, but by this point he's admitted to me that I make him nervous, that he think I'm a really cool and fun and smart and beautiful person, and I made him blush a few times and I think when he kissed me he wasn't sure if I was receptive, so I kissed him and tried to convey I was. But he was so... nervous? Like he kept fidgeting and saying sorry and honestly, he was so goddamn cute blushing like he was. He also kissed kinda nervous, very soft and sweet. After he left and a few more kisses goodbye, he messaged me saying he was sorry he made things awkward and that he really liked me.

I was ready for this to be a quick hookup, but am I alone in thinking this feels like more? I've had hookups, none of them like this. I want to see where this goes but I just wanted to see if I wasn't alone in thinking this way.