To say this has been the hardest 5 days of our lives is a complete understatement and no words can ultimately express the way we feel emotionally and physically…we lost our baby girl Violette Arlene and she was born to be an angel on June 23rd, 2021 at 5:11am. She weighed 6lbs 2oz and was 19 inches. 💜❤️😢 No one should ever have to go through this but yet it happens for reasons unknown. We had a perfectly healthy pregnancy and from all standpoints everything with our baby girl looked perfect…I had my 36 + 6 week appointment and her heartbeat was a strong 160 beats..I was 60 % effaced and 1cm dilated..I woke up the morning of Tuesday June 22nd( 37 weeks + 3 days)leaking fluid and very slightly bleeding..so I called my doctors office and they told me to come in and get checked. I woke Rob up and told him we may be having our baby girl today! So we got our things together and dropped our daughter off to his mom. We went down to the office and I went in to see my doctor..she checked for leaking fluid..it was positive and I was 2 cm dilated and then she checked with the Doppler for the baby heartbeat and she couldn’t find it..she sent me downstairs to get an urgent ultrasound…I went down and got into the room and they checked and her heart had stopped. No blood flow and they couldn’t find her cord or any blood flowing through..they called my doctor in and we received the most heart wrenching news any parent could ever receive..our baby has no heart beat and we had to go to the hospital to be further induced to deliver our stillborn angel..this is not something anyone could ever prepare for…we thought we would be bringing home our new baby girl that day but instead we were devastated beyond belief..and we still are..we don’t know how to truly handle any of this…she should be home with us…she should be here healthy and happy..we don’t know why this happened and we may never know…so many emotions and thoughts running through our minds we have good moments and moments when we break down..things will never be the same..we don’t plan to give up our future..we will try again and know that our angel baby girl will be watching over us and any future rainbows that come..but for now we have to say goodbye and that is hard on its own to cope with…everything they could see was normal..we had the placenta sent for testing and multiple other blood work and also we are getting an autopsy to see if we can determine the cause to prevent it from happening in the future if possible and to give ourselves a peace of mind in hopes that we may have a reason..they said every 1 in 3 that there is nothing they find. That it just happens for reasons unknown. But we are praying to know and taking it one day at a time..the pain and tears come in waves..this is the worst absolute nightmare any parent could face..😢😢.

These were our words 5 days after she was born to our family and friends.

We had found out 8 months later from testing on her placenta and autopsy that:

Her autopsy showed that there was significant inflammation but no infection. And her placenta was not functioning at the proper level and this in turn caused her heart to fail due to not having proper blood flow, oxygen and nutrients to thrive. Otherwise she was fully healthy! Her autopsy showed she grew perfectly and all of her organs were just the way they should have been and no other health problems were found.

Anyways our sweet angel has been looking over us and as we approach her 1st heavenly birthday on June 23rd and Father’s Day is June 19th… I have the biggest surprise for daddy!

🌈🌈🥰🥰 Our Rainbow After the Storm has been conceived 🥰🥰🌈🌈⛈

I plan to surprise him on Father’s Day! Look at the photos! There is a photo book with two pages dedicated to our rainbow 🌈 I wonder if he will catch on 😳🤷‍♀️ If not I have a few other surprises that will definitely show it all!!

Due February 9, 2023 ( Baby will be induced by January 19th, 2023 Due to high risk factors from stillbirth and lots of monitoring!

I am nervous, scared, excited, happy, and just about every emotion you could possibly feel! I am pregnant and it still hasn’t truly hit me that it’s true! Sorry for this long story but I had to put it somewhere 🥰🌈⛈🙏👼🏻 Blessings sent to all who are waiting for their little loves 🥰🌈🙏