Husband told me to put more "effort" into our sex life

First off, I don't even care for sex. I've never reached an orgasm because my husband just goes for as long as it takes him. It's more painful than pleasing for me. He wants me to be on top but after 2 kids and 1 csection my uterus is extremely sensitive and being on top is like being stabbed. The last couple nights he asked me to do it but I've been sick and said no I'm going to bed. So tonight I finally have time and ask and he goes "No. You need to put in more effort. I have to do all the work." Like?? Am I in the wrong here? I do try different positions but they don't always work out.