My boyfriend has a serious health condition that causes seizures and makes the seizures dangerous. At 3am he woke me up and told me to watch him so I stayed up with him until 6 am when he started seizing. This seizure was so brutal. I had him laying down before he started seizing, but he foamed at the mouth and started choking on the foam and couldn’t breathe. He was struggling and fighting so I pulled him up and hit his back and he finally coughed it out of his air way and took a breath. It scared me to damn death. That all happened with EMS in route.

They gave him a lot of Valium along with his seizure meds so he is still asleep. He had four seizures in total, two that EMS saw with me and took care of then one in ambulance and one in the hospital. His neurologist was notified and he decided to hospitalize him. He’s still out cold in the ER. There’s nothing but a chair and usually I don’t EVER leave him there alone. But I am so tired, and on top of that I didn’t have my inhaler and I just got over covid and I needed my inhaler. So I left the nurses station my number and told them to please call me when he wakes up and to tell him I would come. It’s now 11 am and he is still passed out. I thought maybe they forgot so I called.

I am so tired yall I could cry. I barely slept an hour last night. I really really want to lay here and take a nap while he sleeps and just go back when he wakes up and they call me. But I am feeling so fucking bad. I feel terrible because he is alone:( I never ever leave him alone in the hospital. He always has woken up to me, food in hand ready for him.

My body hurts and I know I need to rest. Please tell me I’m not fucking terrible for this.

Update

He is awake now so I’m going back to him. Didn’t get to nap but I got my inhaler and made him a hospital bag