What should I do?…

Question

I cheated on my husband emotionally and I feel awful for hurting him. I’ve explained to him that we don’t have to be together if that’s what he chooses. He told me he wanted to stay with me and work on things. Lately, we’ve been fighting non stop. We’ll be watching a movie, laying together and he brings up what happens randomly. I’ve told him everything, I’ve apologized, but I can’t change the past no matter how much I want to, I just need advice on what I should do

Answer

He has a right to be angry. I know he chose to stay but you have to give him space to be angry, hurt, or anything that he feels. With that said, there has to come a time where you two have to move past it if you want to stay together. Maybe the next step is to go to couples therapy because obviously something wasn't working in your relationship. It doesn't really seem like you're a serial cheater

Answer

Honestly, it’ll pass. 
My husband & I went through a rough patch a couple years ago. We never fought like that before & it was really intense. 
He said he came to the realization that there was a reason I felt the need to go somewhere else because he was treating me so terribly back then. 
He’s been amazing ever since & we’ve never been stronger. 
You just have to give it time & continue to do what you can to be supportive of your husband going through this information.

Answer

how long has it been? as others have said maybe try couples therapy. it’s going to bother him for a while which is valid and understandable, if it hasn’t been that long i’d give him some time and try being patient with him. but after a while he’s going to need to work through his feeling and learn to forgive you to make your relationship work.

Answer

T h e r a p y. Do therapy. 
It feels like an obvious answer to me but I’m not you. But still. You need couples therapy, a safe space to work through the shit going on in the space between your ears. You can attempt to sit down and lay it all out at home but therapists are great moderators and mediators and will try their damnedest to keep it civil.

Answer

Leave him. You cheated, you clearly don’t love him enough to say no to another man. Not trying to be a bitch but if you loved your husband…no one else would be worth your time or effort.

Answer

Don’t wait for “things to calm down” or “work out on their own with time”. Take action. Seek joint therapy and talk through it with a mutual party there to mediate. It will help you both to feel heard and to finally get some closure.

Answer

I’d say suggest counseling. It might definitely help you both. My husband physically and emotionally cheated on me. And we are in counseling. I do the same thing and will be watching a movie with him and something in the movie sparks a thought and I bring it up. But we are in counseling. I’m learning how to heal and trust him and myself. I’m learning a lot about myself. And he is too. Our couples counselor said the best way to succeed in couples counseling is to do individual as well. So we are both doing that. Best of luck! If you need to chat with someone I’m here.

Answer

Therapy or move on. No one ever forgets being cheated on. And most never forgive either. You two can try therapy together or may be best to go separate ways. And just know if you really love a person, you should always communicate with them before cheating, on any level. He may want to work on it but is too hurt and untrusting of you now. It is difficult. I don't blame him for bringing it up again and again. Apologizing doesn't take it back or make it better. Just give it time. Try therapy. Or move on. All the best to you both!

Answer

I’d recommend couples therapy, it’ll be a safe place for you two to be completely honest with each other and find healing

What should I do?…

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