Hi ladies

I apologize before hand as this may be long .

I'm so frustrated,exhausted, unappreciated, feel like I don't deserve to be looked after, in a low mood.

I have been with my hubby 10 years, we have a 9 year old and a 11 week old. I will put in numbers the issues etc. But I'm so lost and feel like I'm in the wrong.

1) my hubby currently works 8-4 Mon- Fri, I'm currently on maternity leave. Before I was on leave I was working,looking after the house,cooking tea and looking after our eldest. Every day of the week. It's exactly the same now just with our newborn added to the addition. Which I do everything and he does bits here and there.my hubby does help with cooking or cleaning in the week or even the weekend, he sits on his back side, playing on his phone/ Xbox or goes to football. I've asked for help and he doesn't help just brings up he works and is exhausted. This really gets to me, am I wrong for asking for help?

2) since having our baby I do everything at first he helped and would wake up and help. I combie feed she's BF all day while he is at work and she has a formula feed as her night bottle, she can have bottle in the morning aswell if it's needed,he doesn't get up with her in the night to settle her or change her, he gets a lie in on the weekends where as I don't get that nor does he ever offer. I'm up with our little one everyday from anywhere between 5-6 and she doesn't always go back to sleep, on top of this I have to do the school run. It would be nice if he would on the weekend even if it's the staturday get up with her and let me lay in, this is after she been fed by me. He gets a full night sleep 7 days a week where as I have had broken sleep and up all day aswell. I'm so tired and feeling low because he won't help there. His mum has come down on two occasions when he's been out and looked after our baby and she's told me to go get to bed and a full night sleep. But her own dad doesn't offer. But when I raise it I'm made to feel wrong and guilt because he works and I currently dont.

3) I look after my hubby, I'll give him a neck massage,leg etc and look after him, there are times I don't because I got so annoyed that I always did it and never got anything in return to help me even if it's something small like a shoulder rub. I get nothing. The last 5 days I have looked after him and not gone to bed till 1am bare in mind I started about 8 after our kids have gone sleep. 1 night I told him I was going to bed I was tired and all hell broke loss. Why didn't I go sleep in the day. I told him our little one was awake and when she slept for 2 hours, I had a house to sort and food and bottles to sort. He said you could have left it. I said who else is going to do it. No one. Which I again feel wrong and guilty for saying, he came out with well you were ok to come give me a cuddle when it's what you wanted but when it's what I want nooo you say your tired. I did get snappy as I was like wow everything I do and the one night I say I'm going to bed as I'm tired and I'm poorly I'm on the wrong. He said now I'll go to work feeling like utter crap thanks to you. Don't expect anything from me. Told me he wants to be with a women who he doesn't have to tell or have a go at. He called me a b**Ch and a c**t, when I cry and get emotional I'm a wet lettuce. Am I wrong for just wantong my hubby to just once help me out especially when I'm poorly. I still do everything whilst he gets to chill on the sofa and sir on his phone or Xbox whilst I carry on with everything.

He was meant to sort the shower out as it had a leak and needing a the flooring done and resealing. He's done most but hasn't gone over the rest to reseal it. So we are all washing in the sink downstairs. Which is really. P***ing me off. So I raised that and automatically I'm blamed for the fact he is doing other stuff, like sorting the toilet downstairs as part of an extension or ripping the floor up and wallpaper off for his office to be done. He leavea all his mess and tools around for me to clear up and when I ask him to sort it and not leave it. He goes well if there wasn't constantly jobs that the tools and mess wohlsnt be there and it's my fault .

I'm so lost and feel so guilty that I now look after him and stay up late as I don't want the repocusions or the kick off.

Am I really out of order and in the wrong for all the above. That in his words I don't deserve anything from him as I expected him to work all week and I don't offer 50/50