Any advice ?

Question

I’m almost 17 weeks pregnant and baby’s father and I haven’t spoken since I was about 4 weeks saying he was shocked, he didn’t want anymore kids at the moment and needed “some time” so I left it at that. I’ve been contemplating updating him on my pregnancy because I found out I’m having a boy and I really want him to know but I don’t want to overstep or make him feel pressured to have part in babies life. My mom is super persistent on taking him for child support but that’s something I don’t want because he said he doesn’t want the baby, so why I should I make him have any obligation to something he doesn’t want?

Answer

Were you two using protection when you concieved? If you weren't, I absolutely would pursue child support. When you agree to have sex with someone, especially if not using any kind of protection, you are agreeing to all of the potential consequences, one of which is a baby. He doesn't have to be a part of the child's life but he does need to step up and take responsibility for his actions.

Answer

He helped make that child. Whether he wants him
Or not, planned or not. He should help support the child financially. I agree with your mother tbh. 
Personally I wouldn’t bother updating him on the pregnancy unless he asks. But your call completely.

Answer

You may think this way now but ur gonna need all the help and support u can get later on.. ur gonna be supporting ur child for 18 years or more.. he might not of wanted a baby but he didn't think about that when having sex with u.

Answer

Don’t put him on the birth certificate

Answer

Child support is to help you support this child financially. He shouldn't get a free pass just because he doesn't want another child. He's knows you're pregnant, if he wants an update, he'll reach out to you.

Answer

OMG I'm going through the same thing right now!! I'm 17 weeks pregnant and me and the BD were never in a committed relationship. He has 2 kids already from a previous relationship and he says he doesn't want kids with a bunch of different women. I'm so stressed and overwhelmed cuz he won't sit down and have a serious talk about this. I need to know if he plans on being a part of this babies life and all the responsibilites that come along with it. If not then I need to mentally prepare myself for this. And then I just start second guessing myself if I'm making the right choice. Even though he wanted me to have an abortion I still give him updates every month. But his lack of communication is really testing my patience!!!

Answer

Well, want it or not, he’s got a baby coming. I’m with your Mom on that child support. It’s your child’s right and it’s up to you to ensure your child’s rights are not side-stepped or ignored. Even if you don’t need the money, that’s your child’s money.

Answer

I also did not take my baby’s father to court for anything. He didn’t want a child and I did. So I just had him sign off rights and I have Complete say over my daughter. He cannot come around later And try to intervene. But if he was genuine, I’d absolutely let him know his little girl. I don’t see anything wrong with you checking in with him to see where he stands and if he asks for an update, you can tell him then.

Answer

You make the obligation because it is partially his responsibility. Whether he wants to be a part of the baby’s life or not, he still helped bring that life into this world & should be held accountable to some degree. When you have sex with someone you are always risking the chance of pregnancy.. even with protection, it can happen. You can’t force someone to be in your child’s life, but if you need the financial assistance, he should have to pay. Actions have consequences.

Answer

Girl don’t update him on anything. He does not care! You should most definitely take him for child support. If he didn’t want more kids he should of thought about that before fucking

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