My boyfriend and I have been together for 8 years. We are 24. (We do not have kids yet).

My boyfriend’s last living grandma died a couple of weeks ago. I know it is still perfectly okay for him to grieve, but he couldn’t stand his grandma and he made it a point to never go around her. Before she died he talked constantly about how crazy and evil she was.

And with the rest of his family, he complained incessantly any time he had to go over to their house on the holidays.

Every holiday he complains about how he doesn’t have any extended family who he can be around and he’s depressed at the holidays because of it

This year I invited my boyfriend over to my parents’ house for thanksgiving. The way I see it WE are a family (me and my boyfriend) seeing how we have been together for 8 years. My boyfriend woke up in a horrible grumpy mood and said he isn’t in the holiday spirit because he doesn’t have any family to celebrate with (keep in mind both of his parents are still living so he has them too).

It just feels like he is always finding a reason to play victim and be in a bad mood. He is like this EVERY year not just the year his grandma who he openly hated died. I asked him if I’m not good enough, if going over to my house isn’t good enough for him and if he doesn’t even see us as family. We basically got in a huge argument and I just wanted to have a happy holiday, I was even planning games and movies for us all to play together with my parents and now it just seems ruined.