Sad and hate this time or year

Leanne

Just need a place to rant about how I’m feeling. My husband and me have been trying for many years to get pregnant he cannot have children of his own due to a medical issue therefore we have been having <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">IVF</a> with a donor. My first cycle I received very low numbers and only one made it to blastocyst stage. I did fall pregnant however sadly miscarried my due date would have been Christmas Day!

Since then I’ve had further rounds but again not great number. I have endometriosis and poly cystic ovaries. We cannot afford any further rounds as well as the emotional whirlwind of <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">IVF</a>.

I currently have two frozen embryos to transfer next year but not holding out much hope. I’m struggling to come to terms with the fact my life may by childless.

My parents are no longer here and my siblings have children in which they do family days out together. I just don’t feel like I’m part of a family anymore.

Some days I feel that bad that I don’t want to be alive as there’s a constant hole in my life I cannot fill. I’m grateful and love my husband dearly but I’m stuck in a place whereby I’m not happy . I know im not alone, life just isn’t fair sometimes.