I want a divorce

Here’s the thing—if you lose your living situation, or they head screaming and fighting, it is not a happy home. I was a kid who’s mom stayed to keep a “happy home” and my sister and I were constantly walking on eggshells. My dad also was self employed and after he ran our finances into the ground because he was sleeping with someone 15 years younger than my mom, our “best friend” that we loved left us the month before our house foreclosed. Guess what, he STILL only saw us a couple times a year. I don’t judge you at all as you are acting out of selfishness but something my moms behavior taught us was that we needed to pursue my dad. As kids, it is very hard to be in the position where you are pursuing a parent for love, or the stars have to align just right for them to love you and want to be around you. It carried into my adulthood and has taken years of therapy to learn you can’t set yourself on fire to keep others warm. I am pregnant now with my first and I would kill for my baby. I could never leave my children. If he leaves them and abandons them, they are losing baggage that doesn’t belong in their life in the first place because all he will do is teach them that love is transactional and they need to perform to be worthy of his love.

Is this the kind of relationship you want one of your kids to have in the future? Have their spouse treat them like shit, blame everything on them, and always walking on eggshells? You staying in a relationship like that sets an example for your kids. You aren’t breaking their hearts if you get a divorce. It’s your husband’s choice to be in their life or not. That responsibility is not on you. He can be a great dad even if you’re divorced. Or a shit dad. But that choice is his. Don’t stay with someone for the kids. They get hurt in the long run.

You're not breaking their hearts. He is.Get a divorce. You're not supposed to be miserable. But also, wanted to say starting your own business definitely rarely brings home any money within the first month.

Get an attorney, file for divorce, custody, & child support

Hasn't he abandoned them already?

Listen to your own advice in your kast line. Don't stay just because you think that's best for the kids. What's best for the kids is a healthy home and happy parents, that includes your happiness. Don't let them grow up thinking it's okay for one parent to mistreat the other and that being unhappy is normal in marriage. If you want a divorce, get a divorce.

File for divorce, full custody and child support. You dont need to tell him beforehand. You can either stay with someone else or he can move out and you can change the locks.

But what role model are you? You show them that you allow to be treated like garbage. And: they can find a new best friend, just as you can find a real partner who loves and appreciates you. That’s what you could show them as well.

You don't have to announce to him that you want a divorce if you are done. You file and have him served.Support, custody, and so on will be handled in court. If he chooses to disappear from his children's lives, that on him, not you. You children deserve a happy mom who isn't being abused. They do not have a happy family. They will not if you insist on trying to hold on to a marriage that is over.

If you want to get a divorce that is something you can definitely do