So my stepsister and I.. we got along great when we were young (10-12 yo) but we got really bad when she felt like I was invading her space - our parents moved in together and we temporarily bunked in her second personal bedroom until my dad converted their attic/her playroom into 2 bedrooms for my brother and I (yes, she had a bedroom, a second bedroom and a huge playroom)

When I moved in with them temporarily, as I had to leave my mom's house for my own physical safety, until I had state support and was able to move into my own place at 17, she was absolutely horrendous. She was constantly snapping at me, conversing with her mom about me not being allowed to be in their home (it was literally that or be homeless) so much so that my dad decided to get me a bedroom with an ex of his. She actually shouted at me once, when I was visiting, about that I had no right to be in her home.. and that she had called her mom and her mom agreed.

So anyway, we're now 29 and 31, we have kids thesame age, and our parents want us to get along.

I feel like I do my part. I send birthday wishes, I send Christmas cards, never a return or a thank you, nothing.

So after 5 years of sending cards and wishes. I decided to not send any this year.

I don't see the point. I don't do this full heartedly, due to our history, but I try to be the bigger person. But it costs money and headspace and I just don't think it's worth it..

I don't think that is wrong or petty tbh.. but our parents might feel differently...?