Porn Addictions Hurt
My husband has had a porn addiction for a while. I know for some people its not a big deal but for me it feels like hes lusting after these other women and is getting off to them so there isnt a huge difference in porn and cheating. I have talked to him time and time again and he even has a whole folder on his phone of *spicy* pictures of me. We have had sex every single day at least once a day for the last like 3 weeks and he still gets up and goes and jacks off in the bathroom after... like immediately following. This morning we have what i thought was good sex then i get up to pack his lunch for work and he gets up to get ready for work. I come back upstairs to ask him if he wants coffee this morning and hes jacking off... I feel so shitty. I feel ugly and worthless and like nothing i do will be enough. I get his lunch packed and I lay back down in bed and burst into tears. He tells me im being too emotional and that hes so stressed out and its the ONLY thing that gives him some relaxation. So it was another knife to hear that Im not even enough to help his stress level. I hate the woman i see in the mirror. Im not skinny enough, pretty enough, or sexual enough. I feel like he only has sex with me out of feeling obligated since were trying for baby number 3. I understand that porn isnt a big deal for some people and I wish I could feel that way but I don't. Especially when he's getting off to it right after we have sex.
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