I am due around August 17th making me right around 7 weeks today. I heard the heartbeat for the first time on Tuesday! Heres my situation and please don’t judge.

I have been a heavy cannab*s user for over four years. I regularly used concentrates but quit those as soon as I found out I was pregnant. About 24 days ago. I weaned myself down from 6-8 concentrate hits to about a bowl or two of flower a day. if you haven’t ever been a smoker, this won’t make much sense to you, but to sum it up I cut back drastically. I’ve seen mixed research, but I knew from the beginning that I wanted to quit because of any risk and the fact that they will test me in the hospital after I deliver. I have been really worried about my system clearing by then just because of my past heavy use of concentrates.

on Sunday, I decided to go cold turkey and I would not use at all anymore. Yesterday I relapsed and had a few hits out of a b*ng and I feel so ashamed. I highly doubt that I will do it again just because of the extreme guilt that I am feeling. has anyone else been through something like this?  My irritability is what caused me to relapse after an argument with a family member. 

on a brighter note, I was also a nicotine (vape) user, but I quit cold turkey 24 days ago. I am so proud of myself for this, and it was not easy!  The first two weeks were the hardest but now its flying by.  I tried telling myself that if I did this that w**d would be nothing, but unfortunately I think it is mentally going to be much harder.

I HAVE TO DO THIS FOR MY BABY.  I know I am beginning just some of the many sacrifices I will have to make and that is why I feel like such a failure for relapsing ):

if you have any advice or just words of encouragement, I would really appreciate it.