No chemistry when texting before we’ve met, can it develop in person?

When I met my ex on a dating app, I’ve never had someone seem so keen. Everything was witty and funny, he would send hilarious pictures of his day, voice notes and soppy messages and I really connected with him. But that didn’t last for long, and when we became a couple, he didn’t even take me on dates, all he ever sent me was TikTok videos and he would only ever talk about himself and his own life goals and issues.

We broke up a year ago. My friends said he seemed narcissistic and entitled, and I’m wondering if that energy and humour in the beginning was just typical of a narcissist and normal men won’t be so full on so soon.

I’m still the same bubbly girl, I’m full of energy, but I can’t find a guy on dating apps which match that energy.

I’m currently talking to a guy and I would be excited about the match, if his texts weren’t as dry. They don’t make me laugh, it just feels like small talk. We’ve not met in person yet… but can someone be better in person and feel chemistry in person, but just not through dating app messaging?

The weird thing is, I find the more average a man is lookswise, the dryer their texting is. So I end up dating selfish assholes often who are better at texting and charismatic.

I’m worried I’m the problem and won’t feel attraction again, attraction to be is based on how I click with someone. I don’t even feel that interested in people on dating apps and can’t get excited about a stranger and I don’t know if this is a normal way to feel?

I used to get super super excited about my matches and literally gush. Now I don’t feel much and I don’t know if this is a healthier way to be, or I’m permanently hurt from an ex.

What I do notice is that I don’t really feel desire looking at a guys photos, but when I was dating my ex, his eyes became the most beautiful thing to me. No guys eyes are giving me the same feeling from photos.