Life advice talk

I'm going through a midlife crisis I guess you know when you feel like you are so stressed and so bored and you feel like you wish you were young again and you don't have a plan for your life you have no idea where you are going what you are doing and basically just are a couch potato how can I change I'm a bum I'm like those movies where they have adult son living with there parents and he's a complete lazy slob and doesn't have anything figured out in life he sucks and I don't know what I need to do in life why am I so lame I procrastinate I don't get off my ass to clean my stuff I do clean the living areas but it's like I don't even want to do it it's a job that I didn't want to do so it's not done. I'm eating junk food and I don't know what to do how can I get some self respect how can I get this life better