I guess o needed to vent…he’s mean to our baby, angry at me for no reason, I had no idea what a short fuse he’d have for parenting. It breaks my heart to see him jerk our baby around and yell at him when he can’t handle the baby just being a baby. It breaks my heart. And I can’t ask for his help with parenting because it means he will lose his shit at the baby then leave him screaming so that I have to then also console the baby AND do whatever it was I needed help with (feeding, diaper change, etc). I’m sick and exhausted and I feel like there’s no way out. I wish it could just be me and my baby. I don’t really mean that but maybe I do… idk 😔. I have been taking anxiety meds to deal with his anger at me and my baby. When he travels for work I feel free again. I’m so sad.

Edit: thank you everyone for your replies. This is obviously a really difficult situation. I got the guts to finally address this with him and he admitted that he is having a much harder time than he thought being a new parent. I told him that’s a start but the wrong thing is to take that frustration out on me or on a baby who is literally just being a baby, and who is never doing anything “wrong.” And I told him he needs to ask me for help and walk away if he feels like this, NEVER take it out on me or our baby. Obviously I have to keep monitoring the situation. I hope and pray this is the start of change here because I’m not letting him “get away” with the behavior and he has been called out and knows I’m watching. He’s been better the past few days and making a point of lowering his voice and being more patient with our son. I still wonder how it could be if I need to leave the house for an appt. I considering putting a small camera hidden and just putting it on when I leave to peace of mind. I’m protecting my child at all costs I can’t see this happen again and I’m glad I spoke up and stood my ground for my child and I.