Stay at home mamas ??

Question

Okay so I've been staying at home with our 11 month old (he'll be one in 4days) since he was born . I've always gave him my upmost attention and my life has revolved around him in every aspect , like a mothers life should . 
​  Here lately though I feel like Im not giving him as much attention . We haven't changed our daily routine or anything . I just feel like I've been overwhelmed with house work here lately and that I can't catch up . 
​  I'm constantly busy doing something , being a stay at home wife and mother is a full time job . I don't know if it's just a new mom phase , and it will soon pass or what !? I hate feeling like I'm not giving him my undivided attention all times of the day. He still sleeps a good bit during the morning , so we sometimes cuddle longer then we should .. But it's been like that since he was born . I don't want to cut that time in half , because I feel like I'm taking that away from him and that's my most treasured part of the day are the sleepy baby cuddles. I honestly feel like i run around in circles all day trying to make sure laundry is done , the house is clean the dishes are done , ect .. I'm extreamly OCD as we'll . So mentally my mind won't slow down and just let things be . Any advice ??

Answer

I struggled with guilt if not playing with my son all day too. However, as he's gotten older (he's 2.5) I've made it a point for him to have time to himself. I don't want my son to have to be entertained by me all day. I wanted to instill in him an imagination and the skill of self entertainment. That means in the morning instead of turning on tv he plays for an hour by himself. He comes in to say good morning and we give him the choice if of snuggling quietly in bed with us or playing quietly in his room. He usually snuggles for a bit then is off to his room! He really likes his time in there and when I go get him for breakfast he's proud to show me what he's been doing. Independent play could also be something like playdoh whole you cook... I still feel like I run circles with housework... Have you ever heard the saying cleaning your house with toddlers is like brushing your teeth with Oreos? ;)

Answer

I had an issue for years with my brain never shutting down. I went to my dr and she put me on sertraline and it got better.
About you feeling your son needs constant attention, he doesn't. He needs to learn to play with himself so you can shower or wash some dishes or eat without constantly having him beside you and in your arms, it's a natural stage of development. I had to do it with my son around 2 months because I hadn't showered in 4 days cuz I was so busy and could never out him down. My mum had to come over to help me so I wouldn't go insane.
​So you can start off by letting him play near you but check on him by looking, he'll still think your playing with him when your talking to him and he's playing with his own toys. Children don't start co-operative play till their about 4, they will do side by side play about 2-3. But at this stage he's more likely to be very content playing alone.

Answer

Don't forget time for Y O U you are mom but you are so much more. Stick to a struck schedule for yourself to get everything done

Answer

I also started making choices. Like did the dishes really need to be washed right this second? Or I can scrubbed the bathroom down when I'm in their next. I can pick up the toys right before I go to bed. Just don't think of the things you need to do, think of ont what you have to do. Maybe invest in a dishwasher (life saver for me since I moved I only have 1 sink) and now I run a daycare I throw laundry in when I wake up, unload the dishwasher and reload it at lunch time, switch the laundry over and then I make dinner. I only do deep cleans during the weekend. I'll vacumm durin the week but only quickly. I also vacumm my tile/bin oleum floor to save me time.

Answer

I'm the same as you but with 2 kids

Answer

I've struggled with this a lot myself. It's hard to deal with when you feel like you are a "bad mommy" by getting essential things done. Here are some of the things that helped me. 1) schedule 2-3 chores a day plus a load of laundry. You will find after scheduling that you will have more time to play. 2) Turn cleaning into play time with your son. Have him hand you the spoons from the dishwasher. Give him his own "cleaning rag" with water so he can scrub too. My LO loooooves that! 3) When I am especially guilty feeling I baby wear. Tie your LO on and do what you have to do while chatting away with him. Explaining everything you are doing will make him feel involved. 4) Feel comfortable knowing that it's ok to let him play by himself. He will enjoy time to himself and the process of starting to make his own decisions. It's ok to take a step back now that he's a little older. You both will appreciate it!

Answer

Sounds like you may be in slight down rut. Yes, it's important to care for our children y home but it's also good to do some thing a little different. Set aside certain times/days for housework, join or create a Playgroup on meetup.com; have a moms day out or date night with your husband. You are already giving your child 100%; you are a wonderful mother :) To feel complete one must find mental/emotional peace in all areas.

Answer

I do all the cleaning during nap time and we play the rest of the time. I think it's good for them to start having a little time to themselves though. Obviously still watching and making sure they are safe but it's good for their learning skills to let them play and do things on their own. My daughter is 17m and she's already so independent. She walked around the house and helps me clean, or plays in the same rooms that I'm cleaning in. But she does great :)
​Hopefully the overwhelming feeling will subside.

Answer

Take a break from wife duties. Once the husband gets home, then kick into wife mode. That's what I do. I play with my daughter all day, and as soon as the husband walks in, I start cleaning and ect. It's a lot easier this way.

Answer

Sounds like you have a ton on your plate! Do you have a schedule for your time to do housework?

Stay at home mamas ??

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