Hormones getting the better of me

I think it's jut my hormones going crazy but the last few days I've just felt so down and I've been crying a lot. Since getting pregnant I've been crying at all kinds of random stuff, but this time I keep crying because I just feel horrible about myself.  To put it simply I'm fat, there's no sugar coating it I'm way bigger than I should be and I tried for years before getting pregnant to drop some weight or any weight. I just could never lose weight. 

One of my friends, much skinnier friends, is pregnant. I'm 17w and she's about 5-6 weeks behind. I'm not starting to show yet because of my weight but I'm getting bigger around the middle, so at this point just look like I'm getting fatter. She's a bit the same, getting tighter around the middle but not showing yet although she will be soon. I guess I'm struggling with the way I look and hearing her complain about feeling fat makes me really upset. I get that she's feeling fat for her and that she would hate it too, but when she talks about it or my BF mentions how she's feeling I can't help but cry. I know it's for a good cause and I knew if get bigger during pregnancy, but I never thought I'd hate my physical self more than I already did. 

Sorry for the negative post!! I couldn't be happier about being pregnant, I just really hate this unexpected symptom!