Well hello there fellow Glowians :)
My name is Samantha and I am 31 years old. My husband and I have been TTC for a year now. I have two kids from a previous LT relationship ages 5&7, but this will be the first child my husband and I are having together, and his first period. This year has probably been the hardest test of strength, endurance and love that we have faced thus far as month after month I keep seeing that BFN. My husband has been super supportive and understanding, but I know that he wants nothing more than to have a child together. Don't get me wrong, he loves my two as if they were his own, but he wants more, and I want to be able to make that happen.
I know a lot of women successfully conceive well into their 30's and upwards, but I cannot help but feel that time is running down for me (silly I know). I guess since I was brought up to believe that if you wanted something bad enough and worked hard for it, you are guaranteed success. So it is kind if frustrating that I have never worked so hard for something in my life and so far have nothing to yet show for it.
I have been reading many a story of women who have a lot more difficulties TTC than I do and sometimes I feel ashamed of playing my "self pity party of one" game every month when
AF shows up.
TTC seems like it has taken my main focus in life. I replay the mantra in my head "it will happen" every day as I cross check every twinge and possible symptom across what feels like a million different search engines and forums known to man just looking for one person who possibly had a
BFP from one tiny thing I experienced on 2dpo.
I chart and track. I try not to hit the same store more than once a month in my quest for
hpt's, and if I do, I either try to go incognito, or camouflage the contents in my basket by throwing other items on top so when I get to checkout I won't get the "knowing" look from the cashier.
This community has been a wonderful source of inspiration and hope to me. I laugh along with your posts, and I feel empathy for the women who are reaching out across the world just trying to find support and kindness during their difficult journeys as well.
I am currently 10dpo and only time will tell if this is month I can add a success story, but if not, I am glad that I do not have to walk alone. Thank you ladies!
Comment
