Get over Him

Cleo • Im a mother of 5 earth babies and 3 angels Ava 18 weeks 10/18/2012 and my twin girls Alex and Adrian 23 weeks 7/21/2014.
I have been with my kids father since we were 13 now we are 34. Are kids are 18,17,16,14,12 we lost a girl in 2012 and just lost a set of twins in July. The loss took a real toll on are marriage and he left. After all these years how do I start over and get over him. (Yes we filed for divorce).