Overeaters Anonymous Group: shared from there until more people join the group.

I know this is a weight loss group and that's different to an Overeaters Anonymous group but at least 2 people said they're interested in that poll so please find the group if you are. 
Here's my first entry to the OA group (posting here too in case anyone can relate to this) 
"Writing/journaling is supposed to help so here it goes. 
Ate so much that my stomach hurts, again. So much that if I move too suddenly I think I'll be sick. 
Spent about an hour looking for online OA chat rooms but they were all either blocked by Java or no longer running or not actually discussing OA. 
What is wrong with me? I wish I didn't feel such an intensive desire to eat to this insane extent. I'm so jealous of people who stop eating when their full. I feel like I'm an animal; if there's food available I can't refuse it because there's some part of me that feels like it's the last chance I'll have to be able to eat it. 
I tell myself so many lies, the biggest one being 'If I eat *** while I'm doing my plan it'll be easier to focus'. I said that this morning and now I'm slouched in a chair too uncomfortable to move and feeling sorry for myself. Occasionally I speak to people who sound like they have a similar problem but very quickly realise I'm much worse and I have to play down how bad I am. I've actually stopped talking to people I've binged with/in front of because I'm so worried/embarrassed in case they bring it up in front of someone else I know. I wish I didn't care about food, I wish I sometimes would forget to eat even. I wish I could take all pleasure from food so that it all tastes bland and then I could eat what and when I need to but I think even the feeling of eating, the textures and excitement of having bought a load of stuff would be enough. 
Anyway so that's what I've done today. 
I'm going to try and write out all my trigger foods (which could take a while) and then try writing a meal plan. Three moderate meals a day and an optional snack. 
My problem is the excuses I manage to come up with. "Just a little bit" "that's sort of healthy though" "this will put you in a better mood though" "you deserve this because today was difficult" "you deserve this because you did awesome today" "you should treat yourself to this because youve done well" "you might as well eat this because you've messed up already anyway"... Constantly going around my head. It's like there's an extra person in my head who wants me to die of some horrible obesity related disease ASAP. 
Anyway. So from what I've gathered about OA I need a meal plan. Eating compulsively when not hungry is breaking the abstinence. Sticking to the meal plan should ensure I know when I should reasonable be feeling hungry or if it's just a craving. 
I'm normally fine eating cooked meals at home, it's when I'm out that the downward spiral kicks in. I'll go to three different shops collecting up a bounty and then sit and eat it until I can't move. I only really enjoy the first mouthful and the rest just gets shovelled in robotically. Maybe I should add shops to my triggers. 
So, writing out my trigger foods and places. I finished the last mouthful of my binge about two hours ago now. 
So let's say  two hours abstinent from compulsive overeating and see how long I can go this time!"
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COMMENT (6)

Ca

Posted at
I THOUGH I WAS THE ONLY ONE!!! When I woke up everyday I say " you going ti eat only when your hungry" but I end up eating more and more and more! I fool myself telling me that I' mnot thaaat fat and that I will go to the gym but they are all lies. I could be sitting watching TV and suddenly I'm craving for a cranberry cupcake or a chocolate cake but at home I don't have any of them so I eat some chocolates I found or candies. I dont know how to stop myself!!

Cl

Posted at
I felt like I could have written this myself...i literally have nothing to add...because this is me. Thats exactly my problem. I hate it. I weigh more than I ever have...and i cant blame it on anything, but myself and my unhealthy relationship with food. :'(

Au

Posted at
I used to over eat...I used to date guys that ate an insane amount so I didn't feel bad about eating as much as I did...as a matter of fact my ex and I would do the eating challenges at restaurants on a regular basis normally together...now I constantly graze...my current called me out for how much I ate so I started bingeing hard at night making two or three meals and devouring them...I would constantly have "healthy" snacks within reach and I hide my addiction as best I can...I want to eat and eat and eat. Sometimes the urge is too great in the day or around my SO that I will make an excuse to go down stairs for a bit, take out the trash going for a walk just so I can inhale a bag of chips or a cake...I am constantly eating or drinking something...I went through a lollipop faze because maybe it was just an oral fixation but it didn't help much...I get antsy when people I eat with don't finish their food and I want to ask for the rest of their food. I never do of course it would be rude. I would love to figure out how to stop eating...it's like the more I try not to the more I end up eating everything in sight. 

Ki

Posted at
Yup I am an Overeater too. I've been looking for OA groups online but either you have to pay or go see a specialist. I've lived food since I can remember, the sight of food, the smell of food, and especially the taste. I understand how you feel, I've been trying to fall out of love with food, and it's not working at best it's a friend with benefits, but there are no benefits when I end up feeling sick, or step on the scale and get depressed. So I've put my life first over food, I eat breakfast, lunch and dinner, I stay away from constantly snacking throughout the day and if I do snack I try to make it something healthy. You should use the my fitness pal app, you put in your weight, your ideal weight and they build a customized caloric intake chart for you, and you can track everything you eat. It will help.

Ki

Kimberly • Mar 18, 2016
I'm replying on my own post because it seems like in the last couple weeks I've gone back to eating everything....all the wrong things....I still log what I eat in my fitness pal n I've noticed that I've been over my daily caloric intake by hundreds of calories, I haven't worked out in a couple weeks, I'm stuck in a rut feeling like I can't get out, I'm trying to change my mindset and take it one day at a time hopefully today will be better

Mo

Posted at
My main problem is that I don't eat, and when I do it's the wrong stuff. I don't really bing or go straight for the traditional candy or chips, my weakness is pasta and breads😞 even when I eat totally healthy meals I have "starved"y body for so many years not eating more then once a day or not eating at all that anything I put in my mouth gets stored. I know I need to eat at least three times a day, I am already diabetic, but sometimes just the thought of food makes me sick. Most days I only have dinner and I only eat then because at that point I'm sweating and shaky and light headed and sick to my stomach. I have tried meal replacement bars, shakes, I did really good with the water maple syrup lemon juice thing, lost lots of weight on it too, but now I can't even seem to make myself do that. I took myself off of soda almost totally, because that is a big problem withe too, instead of eating I could drink soda and not eat all day and be ok with just having a sandwich or something stupid for my meal of the day. I need some kind of plan it a food that I like enough that I can eat at least two or three times a day, and not just anything something that is going to really satisfy me. Now don't gete wrong I love Krispy Kreme originals and can go thru them like a hot knife on soft butter but generally I just don't feel like eating. I'm also sick of the same stuff, hambuger in some way, chicken in some way, fish in some way, turkey in some way. I could eat deer, rabbit etc but it just seems never ending. Sorry for the pitty party but people assume I eat a lot that's why  overweight when the exact opposite is true.