I'm 16, and I previously had something going on with a friend of mine I don't know what I'd call it because we never made it to a relationship. My parents didn't like the fact that at the time I was 15 and he was 17. But we ended up being friends because of this. In my mind I refuse to call him a "friend" because he means so much more to me.  It's been 8 months since we decided to be friends.. But our friendship has been a little rocky because there would be times up to 2 weeks where I'd not contact him... Cause Idk how to make myself not love him and pretend that he means nothing more than a friend to me... I feel like it's impossible. I just have the hardest time having a friend to friend conversation with him. I sometimes tell him about other guys and the things they say to me and he's quick to change the subject. (why does he do that?) Yet he tells me about some of these females he runs across and I let him talk about them.. Idk where our friendship stands I'd never want to lose it I'm just having a hard time communicating and understanding it. I've already talked to him about this several times and he says that I'll always have him.. But that doesn't change the fact that I'm still not able to have a friend to friend conversation with him all because I love him.. 😩😭 I need help.