Sex & Relationships
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Being with someone who cheated
Hi everyone. I was wondering if anyone has been in this type of experience before- has anyone ever been cheated on and decided to stay with the person? If so, how do you cope with the pain you felt from this person without letting that resentment show through the relationship? What do you do to get over the past and learn to trust your partner again, without always second fuessing him or getting anxiety every time he is away from you? How do you not come off as controlling, telling him he can't do things like go out with his friends, because you're afraid that he would bring a girl home when you aren't there? And how long after the cheating but did it take for you to get over it? did it need the point of professional help, like a therapist? Just throwing some questions out there. It's been a while since my bf cheated but I still, deep down, have so much fear. I have nightmares frequently. And the thing is, for the past year almost, things have been great and I've really seen a change in him. He knows he needs to earn my trust and he's been great about it, sending me pictures of him being home to prove that he is home when I'm not there, etc. He had been cheated on by his ex wife and it really destroyed him, so he was jaded in the beginning of our relationship. Now he knows for sure he wants to be with me, and things are completely different than what they were. His mindset is changed. And I do trust him a lot more, but I still get bad anxiety about it, especially now that thugs are great and I love him more and feel closer to him than ever. It makes me terrified that another drunken decision could destroy it all. And he's starting to get annoyed with me "babysitting" him. He feels that he can't do anything anymore and I don't want it to be like that. I just don't know how to get over this fear and really truly believe that he has changed and to move on from the past. (He's cheated a few times-one was a 3-month long relationship with his ex and me at the same time 1.5 years ago, one was when he went on vacation on a guys trip, and then multiple times that I've seen in his phone flirty or inappropriate texting with many other women. But none of this recently.) sorry this is long, and thank you for any responses or advice!