Advice?

Question

My husband and I have been together about 6 years and married 6 months I have wanted a baby for a while now. I'm 23 & he's 25. The whole college thing didn't work out for me the first time and I'm just drained of school in general. My parents want me to go back to school before starting a family but I don't want to go back yet! Every time I see them they are always on my case about when I am going back & tell me not to have kids yet because I will regret it. I do want to go back to school but not anytime soon. I want to start my family. I feel like I would disappoint them if I did get pregnant. Any advice on this topic? I know I'm a grown woman and I'm married now so I shouldn't care about what my parents think.

Answer

I guess the big question is what does your husband think? His weigh in on if it's time to start a family is more important than everyone else combined. Your parents will get over it.

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My parents told me the same thing. They told me If I had a kid first I would never go to college. I chose to have children then go to college. I currently have 2 children and in my first year of college. I do not regret my choice at all. Really and truly my kids give me motivation and more reason to try my best.

Answer

Do whatever you feel is best. Your parents I am sure just want the best for you, but why waste time if you just aren't focused on school yet? They never know you may change your mind and go back for baby but it's all up to you! Never too late to finish school either

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I had a friend that hated school and left. She came back to school and was married and had a daughter. She said her daughter put things into perspective for her. Helped her grow up more and see things differently. She liked school after because she knew she was making a difference for her future and her daughter's. She graduated last year with her bachelors. So do what you and your husband want. Just talk about finances, who is working, etc. You have to make an adult decision on this since it sounds like your parents don't trust that you are. What ever you decide they will get over it. They love you.

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Consider what is truly important to you and your husband because this is your decision and no one else's:) always do what's right for you because you are the only one who lives with your decisions :)

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You are an adult and married!! You don't need your parents "permission" or approval for anything. They shilould support you no matter what you choose. If you and your husband feel like the time is right and your finances are at a good spot,  make yourself a baby!  ;)

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I'd wait. If college didn't work out the first time, it's just going to be harder once you add a child to your list of responsibilities. Think about how you will afford school and childcare and food, diapers, clothes, etc. If you're working and trying to go to school, how will you find the time to be with your child? There are a lot of things to consider.

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I had my daughter before I started college, I think it definitely made school harder, and  took longer, but I'll be graduating with my Bachelors Degree next month, and I wouldn't change the way I did things. It's your life, and you should take which ever path you feel is right for you. No matter what you choose, your parents will come around, and accept it.

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Obviously it's your choice. I think it's a good idea to get school done first. Children are a huge distraction and you don't want to start takingout student loans just to drop out again if it becomes too much to handle. I'm not saying you can't do it or that you for sure wouldn't succeed, I'm just saying it would be easier to finish your degree program. Once you're edcuated and making decent money, you'll have the time and financial stability your kids need.  It's a big decision. Good luck to you.