Holy bajeezus. BABIES. Prepare yourself for irregularly scheduled barfing (both you and the kid), years of sleep deprivation and, of course, the immeasurable joys of spawn. They don’t tell you this when you get one, but babies come with a hell of a lot of stuff. We mean loads and loads of stuff. It can be totally overwhelming, so we curated the 33 absolute best things for your baby registry — some for the little nugget and a few provisions for you too.

1. Jeni’s Splendid Ice Creams Blue Ribbon Baby Collection ($75): Okay, okay, this one is for you. Cooking a baby in your belly is exhausting, but a hand-crafted pint of Banana French Toast goodness delivered right to your door will help. It even comes with a cute little onesie that you can use as a napkin until the baby arrives.

2. Skip Hop Diaper Satchel ($85): The heavens have opened up and delivered this “Chelsea Downtown Chic” diaper bag that looks like it came straight off the runway. Sure beats a changing table.

3. The Honest Company’s Diapers and Wipes Bundle ($80/month): Jessica Alba won’t come wipe your baby’s butt (we checked), but her company will send you all the plant-based diapers and all-natural wipes you need every month. Also, they make dinosaur diapers!

4. B-Jeweled Classic Swaddles ($50): You’re a grown-up now. The term “burrito baby” no longer means you ate a big burrito.

5. Dragon Wooden Ceiling Mobile ($20): Squeeeee! Tiny dragons!

6. Laundry Monster Baby Burp Cloths ($7): Do the math. One vomit-covered shoulder + another vomit-covered shoulder = two vomit-covered shoulders.

7. Sophie the Giraffe ($20): Kids love Sophie so much. Yours is going to just eat her up… because she’s a teether toy. And she’s French!

8. Babyletto Skip Changer Dresser ($390): Bad news. Most baby furniture is not going to jive with your mid-century modern house… except for this stylish dresser/changer! Now you just need… the matching crib.

9. Babyletto Skip 3-in-1 Convertible Crib ($300): This crib will go all Transformers on you when your infant turns toddler. Hooray once again for adorably chic kiddo-friendly furnishings.

10. Stuffed Boo ($17): The cutest baby in the world will need to be accompanied by the cutest dog in the world, clearly.

11. Motorola MBP33 Digital Video Baby Monitor ($180): Spy on your offspring. This contraption has come a long way since the glorified walkie-talkies of the 1980s.

12. Boba Wrap Carrier ($37): Putting on this wrap-tastic carrier takes practice, but it’s oh-so-comfy for mummy and baby.

13. Baby Bunny Hat ($26): Nothing will ever be funnier and floppier than this hat.