Nervous

After reading a few stories of stillbirths, and the fact that I miscarried my last have me very nervous. I'm currently on bed rest and baby has been healthy my whole pregnancy and she's always active. But... idk... I guess I just always felt like I wouldn't ever have a child after I miscarried. I just lost faith and felt like it would never happen for me. Now being so close to delivery (I'm 30wks but also somewhat dialated and having random contractions) I'm starting to really freak out. This is home stretch and I just need to make it a little bit farther. I don't think I could live if I lost her.