We got our BFP last Sunday (14th June), our second attempt.

 We did insemination with fresh sperm, but this time instead of doing insemination on the three most fertile days of my cycle (as suggested by all the lesbian books!), we took a leaf out of the straight couples' book and did insemination every other day for the whole of my fertile week. This is what most hetero couples do as it means there is enough time for the sperm count to go up between attempts. It also maximises the chance of there being sperm waiting in your uterus to fertilise the egg if you are not totally sure when exactly you ovulate.

We used a small amount of preseed, about 1ml each time, 15 mins before insemination. We made sure I had an orgasm as this may help open the cervix and also relaxes everything "down there".

I didn't use soft cups and only elevated my legs for about 10 mins each time... Again this was following advice from hetero couples who told us (rightly) that the sperm leaves the fluid and gets through the cervix within seconds so it makes no difference trying to keep all the liquid up there.

I have also been taking Vitex (chaste berry) for 3 months just to make sure I ovulate.

I gave up caffeine completely too. It's hard but when you get your BFP you have to give it up anyway so might as well go for it.

Hope this helps! Good luck!