Been trying exactly for a year now, devestated

Devestated. No words to describe how i feel. I never knew ttc would be this hard. Do i give up? I dont what to worry about not being able to have kids. I want to be able to not worry about it and not care about becoming a mother. But how do i do this? Every month i am becoming more and more depressed? So am i now categorized as infertile? :(