Well I have been having lower back pain and period like cramps all day since 5:00 it came around 9:00 to where I was like "okay I can't take this anymore in gonna call my doctor", call my doctor and she says to go to the ER or L&D. 

I go to cedars which is forever away (really only 40 minutes) and get hooked up to NST, everything's fine with that, I'm having contractions, (I'm 36 + 2 days by the way) then the doctor comes in says I might be having these because I'm dehydrated. I drink 6 bottles of water a day. So she then checks my cervix it's long. What the heck does that mean? And it's still closed, but she can feel the babies head or the Butt? So she does an ultrasound, head down. Blah blah blah. So I get sent home. Another friggen hospital bill (I have insurance) but it's still annoying. I feel like I keep preparing everybody and then not, I let everyone down 

Everyone must think I'm psychotic

Not going to the hospital until I'm sure from now on. 

Damn it