Thinking about not useing condoms and just the pill and pull out method ??

I cant feel anything when we use condoms and this is my first person ive ever had sex with and im his first too we have had sex before many time during our relationship.... but ive never been able to cum through vaginal sex while useing a condom ....ive never cum at all ....

My friend is on the pill and they dont use one and he just pulls out or puts it in her somewhere else lol...

But im I stupid for wanting to use just the pill ?

Also what are those gels you squeeze in ur vag that kill sperm ? Are they good ? Where can I get them? Do they work?