So, I am addicted to glow and poas. I want to put this out there for some of you to read. Not to give false hope rather to just share the roller coaster ride I have been on the past month!!! It started July 3rd. I rolled over in my bed upon waking and thought to myself, "I think I should have started my period??" I have been a glow user for about 6 months... Mainly to just remind me when I am suppose to start my period. I have twin boys that are 10. A little girl that is 8 and the newest addition to my life a little boy 6 years old (dh's). We got married in April of this year. We weren't actively trying to get pregnant, but our mindset was if it happens it happens. Still trying to wake up I managed to find the <a href="https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.glow.android">glow app</a> and open it. I looked at the top. A surge of blood ran to my head delivering an instant adrenaline rush. I am most certainly awake at this exact moment that I realized I was suppose to start two days earlier!! Could this be??? I hold my urge to pee. Get ready. Get the kids ready. Run down to the store and grab a pregnancy test. Not the most expensive but not the cheapest. Accu clear 2 pack. 99% accurate. Yeah, this one will do. I go home and b line for the bathroom. I hurriedly read through the directions, I pee on the stick and wait... I think I see a positive result. I wait. Why the hell isn't it darker?? Give it time... Ok, times up. Hmm?? What does this mean?? It's faintly there. I don't understand. This isn't how it went the other times. It was much like a flashing neon sign with bells and whistles. Hmm? Ok. I'll just pee on another... Time comes and I'm in the same boat. Ugh!!! This is aggravating. My boobs hurt so bad. I'm late. I'm never late!! I call dh. He tells me to go to the doctor. Ok. It's settled. I'm gonna go to the clinic. Off we go. I endure the tretorous 4 hour wait... First test... I pee in a cup. Results are in. It's negative. I feel stupid. I am in disbelief that I am wrong. Hide your expression. I don't want any consoling. That deep down hidden urge to have a baby has been fed and is sprouting. She wants to cover all bases so she is going to draw a beta hcg. I say ok. I'm hurt and let down and just want to leave and pretend that this didn't happen, but I wait. Lab has been drawn and she tells me I will be called with the results Monday. That evening... Yeah, I was just too hopeful. Af is here. I grab a tampon and go on about my weekend. I notice that it isn't very heavy this time but don't think much of it.  Monday morning the bleeding has almost subsided but I just know it's going to hit with an avengance soon!! My phone rings. "Mrs. Milton?"