Miscarriage or ectopic?

Yesterday I started having pains and heavy red bleeding and passing way too many clots. My husband brought me to the ER and when I went to the bathroom for a urine sample I believe I passed my baby in the toilet. The pain stopped and I left it so the nurse and or doctor could see. The doctor said just flush it. After my ultrasound they say I'm having an ectopic pregnancy. How? I'm not in pain anymore and what I passed in the bathroom looked like a pregnancy?? They're making me stay for observation and possibly surgery. I feel it's unnecessary surgery they want to do, I have no more pain. I can't stop crying and angry at myself.