Hating Myself (long)

I haven't felt this way in a while, completely hating myself. Just stepped on the scale to find out I've gained another 10lbs. That's it! I've had it! I don't know what to do anymore. I've been depressed lately and all I do is eat, sleep and work. I've been overweight my whole life and I'm sick of it. It's line I have absolutely no self control when it come to food. And I haven't been back to the doctor in a long time. My doctor left and the new guy is just an ass and I don't even wanna go because I'm gonna hear the same story again. I just need help and support because I'm really at my wits end! 😖