Almost one month ago, I found out I was pregnant. Then, yesterday, I found out I am not. It's weird how things like happen....for most of my life I wasn't sure if I would ever be ready to be a mom. But, when my period over a week late...I just KNEW. And I was right. The test came out positive and I was more ready for it than I ever thought I would be, which almost surprised myself. My husband and I have been married for almost 3 years and I knew how excited he and our family would be. And they were - everyone was over the moon. I went to the Dr. And they confirmed the pregnancy. But, I had started spotting and they wanted me to go get an ultrasound. I wasn't too worried because it was "old" blood and I'd read that it happens to 25% - 35% of women in their first trimester. And I had just peed in the cup and they said I was preggo! According to my LMP I should have been about 7 weeks, BUT I knew my conception date, and that was around 3 weeks after! So, I knew it was early, but at the ultrasound it was too early to see anything. So, they had me come back almost 2 weeks later (which was yesterday)...and nothing had changed so they told me it was not a viable pregnancy. They said it can happen for a multitude of reasons. I know that it could have been a lot worse and I am thankful that this happened early, but we are all sooooo bummed out. We were planning to tell our best friends this weekend, as we have sort of been avoiding them until we had more information and felt more comfortable, etc. I bought multiple books from Amazon a few weeks ago and had started reading. Needless to say, hubby and I spent the evening in tears. But, I firmly believe everything happens for a reason, and this was meant to happen. It'll happen for us when it is supposed to. Which is what I always tell my husband (even before this, since I've been off the pill for a little over a year)...he asked what the reason was for this to happen and I said that we aren't supposed to know. We just have to trust it. I feel such pain for those of you that have gone through this multiple times, because I feel like I couldn't go through this again. What's worse is that I saw one of my BFF's moms at the clinic yesterday --- her daughter doesn't even know our news -- and she was so excited, we asked her not to tell anyone and she asked me to text her after my appointment and let her know how it went. So I had to tell her it was bad news and to please not say anything. I thought, "Really?????!!!! WHY did I have to see her there? What are the chances?" *sigh* okay, I think I've rambled long enough. Anyone that reads all of this, thank you.