Help!

Boyfriend is super hot, but we don't have sex often because it seems like we have to plan it every time and it's not exciting like it should be. He doesn't like kissing or any lovey-dovey stuff until he's really into it. That thing is, the stuff that he doesn't like are the things that turn me on. What do I do? We've been having sex for 10 months and we still haven't mastered this.