Dreams

I had a horrible dream last night in won't get into the details of the dream but I ended up having a boy (i already have 2 in rl) instead of a girl. The delivery happened at some 2nd rate place and I was on "such good drugs" I didn't even come around mentally until about a week after the c-section... When i awoke on the couch my parents were mumbling to each other saying "she's gonna be mad" and I was like huh.. I was still out of it trying to grasp onto the situation.... Anyway I walked over to the pack and play and I see this baby in it that's clearly a boy and I just started crying I didn't even want to hold him.... I literally hated him... I didn't want to feed him I didn't want to even name him. My s/o cane down stairs and said... Well I guess you saw the Dr's were wrong... Its a boy... And i just ran away crying...

There's more but I'm sure you get the jist... I feel like such a terrible person for feeling this way. I felt sad when I woke up even because of the dream.

I'm. 26 weeks and we had an ultrasound at 18 and we're told 90%,girl ... I guess since we already have 3 boys between us there is the hidden anxiety.. But I would never hate my child due to gender... Will I be disappointed if the tech was wrong... Absolutely but not enough to even remotely act like that...

I feel like a bad person... We have 10-11 weeks to go..