Feel hopeless

Af is 10 days late . Multiple negatives . Today I'm extremely moody , irritated and cranky and fighting with everyone . This happens exaltly a day before Af so I know for sure it will be here in a day . I've given up. Il never be a mother I guess . Life is really tough . I'm beyond stressed . I just don't know how to live without this ttc stress . Feel depressed and suicidal but holding myself together . Thanks for reading .