Stillborn?

Has anyone ever experienced a stillborn birth? I had my baby at 31.5 weeks. I was at a routine checkup and they couldn't find his heartbeat 😔. TTC now since this happened and it's been about 8 months. I got pregnant 4 months after this lost but it ended in a early MC. I'm feeling so low at this point. Maybe because I got AF this morning? I just needed to vent. No one I know understands me and makes it so difficult to talk about. I have a hole in my heart that cannot be filled. I'm hoping to find support here. Thanks for reading.