Still no ultrasound

Sami • 24yrs old lost my baby when I was 9weeks, God has blessed me with a baby boy! Due June 11th!
I still havent had an ultrasound and ill be 9 weeks sat. My ultrasound is on wed but I HATE my OBGYN shes a joke and i miscarried in dec at 9 weeks and im scared. Im trying not to stress but i wanna see my baby already and i just dont know what ill do if i lose this baby because we tried for 2 yrs with the first now this one almost a yr. Any advice or uplifting comments? 😔