Depression from not being pregnant

Has anyone ever felt depressed or a little at least from not being pregnant. Like if it's truly what you want but you can't because it does happen, or maybe financially your not ready so you put it off but get depressed from it ? I think I'm going through that I already have kids and at some point after my last was born in didn't want anymore I actually didn't I always wanted to see a negative on tests and this isn't like baby fever like I used to always see pregnant people and babies but I still didn't. Now I actually want one well we both want one and I feel like we've been making ourselves think that we don't because we're scared and scared of people's judgements because a lot of people judge when you have a lot of kids but it's what we want lately I've felt depressed and I've been trying to get to the bottom of it and it's because of this because we want a baby . I'm not depressed about anything else I know having the baby I want will make me so happy