HELP PLEASE

Tay
I've had a really shit day because my friend (guy) has hurt me. He's become bitchy and doesn't seem to care about me anymore. I was going to OD but I stopped myself. This isn't the only thing going on. There's more but this just kinda tipped me over. I took laxatives and purged today. I've been clean from doing anything for over 120 days and I'm almost at my record. I just feel hopeless and this friend doesn't seem to get it. It doesn't help I have to be around everyone for my 18th on Monday 😭 why do I feel so shit. Idk what to do help.