I am 16 and I find life both simple and confusing. Periods are now the norm but Nevertheless a pain up ones butt crack. But mostly painful in ones uterus. I went through an emotional time in year 8 (7th grade) but now am starting to feel really hormonal again. I have been doing stuff with random boys but have not yet had sex- though I am undeniably ready to. I don't know how to talk to boys unless in an hideously open and jokey way. There is one boy I fancy but would never go with me because I am me. Sometimes I look in the mirror and think wait- am I pretty? But then look at pictures of Kendall Jenner and the person in the mirror looks more like someone's fat grandma. My dad used to be really mean to me in ways I can't pinpoint. Ways that include calling me a disappointment, pushing me over, threatening to call social services to take me away. I know he wasn't serious but when he threw stuff at my head it didn't feel like a joke. I love him and would hate to call him abusive, so I won't say that. But then why does disgust fill me everytime he is nice to me. He has been kind and caring recently and it just makes me angry because when he's being nice I feel like I am wrong in hating him somewhere in my heart. The piece of my heart that broke when my mum didn't stand up to him and I started to bang my head into a wall until I got too dizzy when I was 8. But he is nice now. So there you go. Just wondering if anyone has anything to say about any of this because I sure don't know how to put any of it into words to a living being. Besides, I am 100% happy now.