We got together today for Thanksgiving holiday with my husbands family. His older brother and wife got married this June. My husband I have been together for 8 years and married for 3. We have wanted to start our family for a long time but when we were finally ready last year his brother came home for Christmas and announced they were engaged and getting married across the country in 6 months. At that point we had to put our plans on hold due to the large financial strain the trip across country put on us. We put our family on hold so that we could celebrate the start of theirs. We were so happy but it was also difficult at the same time. When we were finally able to start trying again it took 5 months. Finally we found out we were pregnant with our twins and were so excited to share the news with the family. We had planned to tell them today. Today should have been so happy but instead in October we had to share that we had lost our angels. Only in the last 10 days have i finally stopped having extreme pain and bleeding. 11 days ago i passed the last twin. Emotionally I am a wreck. Tonight we got together and my sister in law broke my heart by telling me they are 4 weeks along and are announcing to the whole family tomorrow. I faked my best excited smile and will have to do so again tomorrow but all I want to do is curl in a ball and cry. My angels are gone. I'm empty, sad, and wanting them back so badly. I feel so terrible that I am jealous and angry but it's tearing me apart. I knew this would be a hard weekend because of what we had originally planned to share but now it's just that much more painful. I just needed to say what I was feeling somewhere safe where maybe someone would understand.